Overrated

I’m probably going to be castigated by everyone in this town who’s trying to Keep Austin Weird, but I’m going to say it anyway.

Barton Springs is overrated. So there.

It’s cold, crowded, and filled with algae. And if I have to swim with plants and fishes and other unknown objects in the water, I’m going to swim in the sea. Thank you very much.

The Austin Parks & Rec website says the place “attracts a diverse crowd of people.” And that is most definitely, visibly, horrifyingly true. I did not know you could put a tattoo there or grow that much hair there or wear such tiny little speedos that show off both the scary tattoo and all that hair. Definitely keeping it weird.

Suffice it to say: I will be skipping the Springs. For the rest of my life.

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